I’m more than a little behind in penning
reviews of my recent literary conquests. Hopefully I can get through the
backlog before I forget the books completely. Until then, however, I thought it
might be fun to play around with a more forgiving form of criticism: the one
line review. Here are a handful of so-called classics, summed up in a single sentence:
- Middlesex: My Big Fat Greek Wedding meets 5-alpha reductase deficiency
- Silas Marner, because anti-social cataleptic weavers make good fathers, too.
- Jane Eyre: Finally, a romance for the homely.
- Wuthering Heights: reality TV before TV ever existed.
- Crime and Punishment: it’s Lizzy Borden meets Colombo- in St. Petersburg!
- As I Lay Dying: when your mom dies you should probably cut your dad some slack- unless he’s a complete sumbitch
- The Turn of the Screw: It’s what the Sixth Sense would have been if Bruce Willis were a Victorian era governess.
- Grapes of Wrath, because even though your life might swing between bad and awful, at least you’re not suckling emaciated homeless strangers yet.
Got any others to add?
