Thursday, September 20, 2012

Speed Reviewing

I’m more than a little behind in penning reviews of my recent literary conquests. Hopefully I can get through the backlog before I forget the books completely. Until then, however, I thought it might be fun to play around with a more forgiving form of criticism: the one line review. Here are a handful of so-called classics, summed up in a single sentence:
  • Middlesex: My Big Fat Greek Wedding meets 5-alpha reductase deficiency
  • Silas Marner, because anti-social cataleptic weavers make good fathers, too.
  • Jane Eyre: Finally, a romance for the homely.
  • Wuthering Heights: reality TV before TV ever existed.
  • Crime and Punishment: it’s Lizzy Borden meets Colombo- in St. Petersburg!
  • As I Lay Dying: when your mom dies you should probably cut your dad some slack- unless he’s a complete sumbitch
  • The Turn of the Screw: It’s what the Sixth Sense would have been if Bruce Willis were a Victorian era governess.
  • Grapes of Wrath, because even though your life might swing between bad and awful, at least you’re not suckling emaciated homeless strangers yet.
Got any others to add?

1 comment:

  1. The Grapes of Wrath line made me laugh. It can't get any worse than that.